I went to renew my driver's license this week. I saw the picture and thought, who is that old woman?
In my mind, I look much younger than what I see in the mirror or in pictures.
Ridiculous vanity, I know.
I am not being melodramatic.
I didn't think the big 4-0 would bother me.
It kinda lurked beyond my focus for a while, somewhere in the distance.
But now, it is here.
I think if it were a happier time in my life, it might not bother me so much.
30 didn't bother me at all.
But as it is now, it just seems so final.
Youth. is. over.
Ages 25 - 35 were some of the happiest, and most fun years for me.
There may not be anymore carefree days like those ahead.
Ahead are the days when parents get older and ill.
Children get older and go through life struggles.
The body is aged and careworn.
The poor decisions and lack of planning during youthful years come back to haunt us.
And there is no "do over".