But, that's what all kids do I suppose, and I quit dreaming a long time ago. Dreaming really seems pointless and a little sad, because reality is what it is.
Dreams are just that, dreams.
Recently, though, I have let myself day dream about what my perfect day would be like. I have to admit, I have been surprised that it has been a little bit fun. I have enjoyed imagining what I would do if I didn't have to work...
I would get up early, stress free, and have a relaxing cup or two of coffee as I leisurely read my bible study and have my quiet time. Then, I would pack nutritious lunches for the kids, and prepare something healthy for them to eat. I would wake them up and help them get ready, without a mad rush, because I wouldn't be getting ready myself. We'd drive to school laughing and singing with the radio. Then, I would get in my morning workout. I might run at the park, take a class at the gym, or even just follow a workout video at home. After this, I'd need a fresh and fit mid morning snack, which I would have handy at home. Now, with the kids at school, I could get the laundry going and clean the house. I might have another cup of coffee while doing this. Then, I would have a long hot shower, with no one screaming my name, and without feeling the rush to hurry up and get ready. I would get dressed and head out to run a few household errands, maybe get a little shopping done. I might meet a friend for lunch, or dare I say that stranger I live with. Next, I would spent an hour or 2 in the afternoon volunteering at the school, or church, or some worthy cause. After that I would head over to the Fresh Market and leisurely stroll through the calmness, looking at all of the new items, and picking up a few things for our nutritious, organic dinner. I would pick up the kids on the way home, and give them a homemade afternoon snack. Then, we'd get homework done, and spend some time playing in the yard. They would continue to play as I cooked dinner, and then we'd all sit down and eat together at the table and we'd spend time talking about our day and planning for tomorrow. Next, it would be bath time for the kids, then stories, prayers, and bed. I might even get to read a book or magazine of my own after they went to sleep, or spend time with the husband, because I wouldn't be rushing around to take care of all of the things I couldn't do because I had been at work all day, and preparing for the next day because I would be at work.In having this little daydream, I realize a few things. It really is the simple things that are the most important to me. Time is my biggest enemy, along with the evil dollar.
And it looks like at this point in my life, even when I am not yet 40, I suppose all I can dream for is my modest retirement.
But by then it will be too late.
I will have spent all of these years in the interim, in a rushing whirlwind of madness, and by then my kids will be grown and gone. And I will have missed it, just like I missed their time being babies.
I guess maybe, I might have a chance with grandchildren, if I am lucky.
And with as much of a blessing as all of that will be, it makes me sad to think about right now, as I go through these "lost" years.
So I might just quit dreaming again.